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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 8:18 pm 
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Earlier this year Maxim counted down the 20 'Greatest Awful Movies of All Time' which looked a half hearted attempt to make another list of cult guilty pleasures. An odd selection, but there are a handful of mine in there.

***

"20. The Beastmaster: Half Conan and half Dr. Dolittle, loincloth-wearing Marc Singer is Dar, a man who talks to the animals…and kills people.

19. Hard Target: Jean-Claude Van Damme?s lone film with Wilford Brimley is good family fun, provided your idea of family fun is watching homeless Vietnam vets being hunted for sport.

18. Hot Dog…The Movie!: It has skiing, a jagoff German and topless scenes. Instant classic.

17. Over the Top: A Stallone steamer about a man who regains his son?s love by arm wrestling.

16. Tango & Cash: Ali and Frazier. Magic and Bird. Sly and Kurt. It?s a dream pairing of B-movie icons in the tale of rival cops who bond by putting grenades in people?s pants.

15. They Live: ?Rowdy? Roddy Piper has sunglasses that enable him to see that many people are, in fact, aliens. It?s a real crowd pleaser.

14. Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins- They were looking for a blockbuster action franchise. That didn?t happen.

13. Boondock Saints: Writer-director Troy Duffy was supposed to be the next Tarantino. His one film pre-flame-out features Willem Dafoe swishing it up as a gay FBI agent.

12. Starship Troopers: Satire of fascism or just miserably acted flick about kids who wanna squash some bugs? At least it stars Doogie Howser!

11. The Toxic Avenger: Troma Films? masterpiece reveals what happens when a nerdy janitor falls in toxic waste: superpower strength to rip off a person?s arm and beat him with it.

10. Best of the Best: James Earl Jones, Eric Roberts and the US karate team beat Koreans into kimchi.

9. Missing in Action: While Vietnam wasn?t much fun at the time, it?s made for a lot of awesome movies. This one may not have the cinematic merit of Full Metal Jacket, but it has something better: Chuck Norris.

8. Commando: After a former Latin American dictator snatches his daughter, Arnold Schwarzenegger?s ex-GI John Matrix must rescue her using only violence and one-liners: ?I let him go,? ?He?s dead tired.?

7. The Island of Dr. Moreau: Your chance to see Brando with an ice bucket on his head.

6. Billy Madison: The inspiring tale of a lad who just wants to ?touch the hiney.?

5. Dead Alive: In this pre-Lord of the Rings gorefest by Peter Jackson, zombies battle with Father McGruder, the kung fu priest.

4. Dolemite: The coolest/worst made blaxploitation flick. A pimp tries to duck the boom mike drifting into shoots.

3. Showgirls: Nomi?s a small-town gal with big dreams to become a topless dancer in Vegas. She must first endure sleazy casino execs, rock stars and much gratuitous nudity.

2. Porky?s: The subplot about anti-Semitism wasn?t the best, but respect must be paid for bringing glory holes to the mainstream and teaching us why Kim Cattrall is called Lassie.

1. Big Trouble in Little China: Kurt Russell needs to save a green-eyed girl from a Chinese man who wants to marry her so that he can take over the universe. Or something like that. Honestly, no one knows what?s actually going on in this guns and kung fu mishmash, but if you spot it while flipping channels you will watch it until the end..."

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 1:55 pm 
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Richard wrote:
Maxim counted down the 20 'Greatest Awful Movies of All Time'

1. Big Trouble in Little China


No, no, no!
http://www.videovista.net/reviews/june0 ... ouble.html
:lol:

Richard wrote:
..if you spot it while flipping channels you will watch it until the end..."


Sounds like praise to me, what's 'awful' about BTILC, anyway?
Someone missed the point, I think.
:roll:

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:33 am 
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Good review - BTILC is an ace film!

For my money, the best worst film is 'Spiders' from Nu Image... it's a laugh a minute.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 11:52 am 
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friendlygun wrote:
best worst film is 'Spiders' from Nu Image... it's a laugh a minute.


This one, Spiders?

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 2:03 pm 
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Both Big Trouble and They Live are far from being awful... :evil:

They Live is a great sf flick. :D


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 2:22 pm 
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Rubbish list.

Starship Troopers doesn't belong on it. Excellent film. Doogie Howeser in a Nazi great coat. A classic moment in sf cinema.

Neither does Remo: Unarmed & Dangerous - which is the title it was actually released under in the UK. I know because I went to see it at the cinema. Twice.

They Live is classic Carpenter. "I'm here to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and I'm clean out of bubblegum".

I bet that list was put together by someone who thinks Aliens is the best Alien film film, and The Wrath of Khan is the best Trek film...

:-)

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 2:25 pm 
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I have to say, BTILC is a favourite film of mine. Yes, it's not the most artistic or intelligent thing ever made. But it's good fun! Why is that considered a sin by the cinema-critiquing clique these days? Same with Starship Troopers. And Stargate (another much-maligned film).

Where are all those movies which take themselves so seriously and suffer from poor production values, poor scripts, poor plotting, terrible world-building, wooden acting ... Basically the relatively recent 'Godzilla', or any of the 'episode six in a franchise which should never have even got to the screen in the first place'? Or the, 'lets remake yet another good film but 'update' it for the modern audience' type flicks?

Pah. Some people have no taste.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 3:31 pm 
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Tony wrote:
friendlygun wrote:
best worst film is 'Spiders' from Nu Image... it's a laugh a minute.


This one, Spiders?


That's the one! I love all of Nu Image's "creature features" - generic, bland, tacky, cheap, and utterly hilarious. You can even play a "spot the gaffe" drinking game (added fun from arguing over whether something was deliberate or not, such as how the name of the shuttle appears on its hull after the crash - notice anything wrong there? ;).

It's hard to find decent bestworst films, though. There's a delicate balance there. For example, on the face of it Boa vs Python is an obvious contender. Some big game hunters have a giant boa constrictor captured so they can hunt it in the US with high-powered weaponry. It gets loose and the feds catch wind of this. Ingeniously, they immediately work out what's happened and determine that the best way to catch the boa is to unleash a radio-controlled giant python. It's absolute nonsense, and therefore seems perfect. And yet the film itself is, a few great moments aside, really very dull.

I figure that Nu Image have figured out how to make a weakness into a strength, which is why their films are so consistent.

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 Post subject: Nog Trouble
PostPosted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 1:33 pm 
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Big Trouble is just a great, fun film. I'm not sure why someone would call it a great bad film. It isn't a bad film by any stretch of the imagination...just a highly entertaining B movie which is light years better than most B movies.

And to Ian Sales - Sorry, but ALIENS is the best of all of the Alien films, but a long stretch. You seem to be suggesting that the person who thought that was weak-headed in some way.


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 Post subject: Re: Nog Trouble
PostPosted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 2:18 pm 
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John Dodds wrote:
And to Ian Sales - Sorry, but ALIENS is the best of all of the Alien films, but a long stretch. You seem to be suggesting that the person who thought that was weak-headed in some way.


Scientific studies have proven that an individual's favourite Alien film is the one that they saw first. By which I mean I've most everyone I know and their favourite film is their first encounter with the series, regardless of the actual worth of the film.

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 Post subject: Re: Nog Trouble
PostPosted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 4:49 pm 
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John Dodds wrote:
And to Ian Sales - Sorry, but ALIENS is the best of all of the Alien films, but a long stretch. You seem to be suggesting that the person who thought that was weak-headed in some way.


Quite clearly they are weak-headed. Doogie Howser in a starring role is not good - and to say that is one reason why Starships Troopers does not suck is clear evidence of feeble-mindedness.

Doogie Howser in a Nazi greatcoat, on the other hand, is an entirely different kettle of fish.

Sorry, John, but Aliens is just the Vietnam War in space, with moronic marines and the supremely-evolved killing machine of Alien treated as little more than a cockroach.

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 Post subject: Aliens
PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 11:00 am 
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At least Aliens had another dimension besides monster-hunting. At the time Aliens came out Vietnam was still being reflected on in cinema and other artforms. Alien, the first film, much as I enjoyed it, was basically a reworking of a bit of O'Bannon's great script for Dark Star. Except in Dark Star the alien was a beachball with chicken claws.


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 11:09 am 
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They lost the Vietnam War. It's time they accepted that and stopped trying to win it in film, television and written fiction. Mind you, after the ongoing farce that is the Iraqi invasion, they'll probably be able to rewrite history such that they did win, and no one will remember the truth because of the shadow of Iraq. After all, the neocons are already busy trying to persuade the world that Mussolini and his fascists were left-wing...

:-)

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 Post subject: Re: Aliens
PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 7:03 pm 
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John Dodds wrote:
Alien... was basically a reworking of a bit of O'Bannon's great script for Dark Star.


But, sometimes, it's not who had the idea first... it's what the filmmaker(s) do with it. DARK STAR is, certainly, great fun... but as SF, it's obviously inferior to ALIEN, and not just in budget and design.
8)

Anyway, ALIEN owed much to A.E. van Vogt's Black Destroyer, part of classic fix-up novel Voyage Of The Space Beagle - which I've always thought influenced STAR TREK (but that's another story!).
:wink:

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 9:15 pm 
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Didn't they have to pay van Vogt because it "owed" it so much?

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